Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
