He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
