Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
