omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Randomize
