My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
