i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
