Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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