dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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