Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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