Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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