She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
