talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
