Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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