dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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