Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize