I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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