Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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