Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
you didnt know i had herpes?
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
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