Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
