I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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