hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
