the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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