video games are the ultimate cock blocker
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
