As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
