Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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