I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
