I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
