when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
