Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
