my sisters under your porch take her home
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
a search helicopter?!
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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