My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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