At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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