redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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