when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I want to be your penis for a week.
i've created a new STD.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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