Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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