What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Randomize
