He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
