Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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