I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
