Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
