I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
