Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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