I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
