What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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