idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
did i walk over a car last night?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize