I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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