why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
