i permit you to call me
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
