Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
