Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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