dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
