you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
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